Values

The privacy of children


Between the ages of 11 and 13 our children will begin to demand more privacy, they will prefer to shower and dress alone and find spaces where they can listen to their music, read or lie down to think.

You may have already begun to detect this behavior in your children, and before worrying you should know that this is a time of transition and changes that parents must also adapt to.

Why do children need privacy? Should we, for example, let them close the door of their room?

If you are the father or mother of a pre-adolescent boy or girl, you may have noticed that for a while your child has begun to claim his space, he seeks more privacy when dressing and showering but also spaces to be alone with himself. Between the ages of 11 and 13, perhaps a little earlier in some cases, boys and girls they need their spaces and we, as parents, must know how to give them to them while respecting their privacy.

Preadolescence is characterized precisely by an attempt in children to leave their childhood behind and break with family ties, an increase in the sense of modesty and shame towards their own body, as well as a great sensitivity towards criticism of others, fear of being ridiculous and, of course, a growing need for independence and therefore privacy at home.

Knowing this, allowing our sons and daughters to spend time alone with the door of their room closed should not pose any problem, since children of this age need these spaces to know themselves better and reaffirm their personality.

If what worries us is the cyber world, what they see, read or discover on the internet or the type of relationships they establish through social networks, we can adopt different measures such as having computers in common places at home and applying parental controls that restrict the sites where they can access.

At this age it is also normal for them to start looking for answers about their sexuality, feel excited and the need to masturbate appears. This normal and natural behavior should never alarm us unless it becomes a compulsive activity. As long as we naturally accept this behavior, which is part of our children's sexual development, we can guarantee a suitable emotional climate for our children and we, their parents, will know how to close the doors when they need it.

To this need for privacy is added the need to preserve your privacyIn other words, it is not convenient for us to criticize or explain details of their personal life to other people. If they want to explain something we must allow them to expose it themselves and respect that if they do not want to do it they have every right to abstain. That said, it is important just as it is in other stages of children's development, that we do not compare them with their siblings, cousins ​​or acquaintances, they are unique and unrepeatable, with their pluses and minuses and we must know how to accept them as are.

Our children need understanding parents that are not permissive, as I always say, and this means being parents who understand their changes, parents who are accessible when they need us, parents with a willingness to listen, agree and understand, but also firm parents with clear rules and limits, parents who know them redirect when they are wrong and know how to reach out that hand that comforts them when they are lost. Mr father is not easy but for a child growing up is not.

You can read more articles similar to The privacy of children, in the category of on-site autonomy.


Video: Protecting Childrens online privacy and identity. Internet Matters (December 2021).